Mother's Day

Sunday was Mother’s Day and though there was no big extravagant celebration, it was filled with perfect little moments that make me so happy to be a momma. 

My Mother’s Day actually began a couple of months ago when I fell in love with Darius Rucker’s version of “Wagon Wheel.” I told Alec above anything else, I would love for my boys to sing “Wagon Wheel” to me on Mother’s Day. After that night anytime we’d hear “Wagon Wheel” my boys would ask “Is that ‘Wagon Wheel’?” Hmmm…someone has been teaching these boys this song…

On Sunday, we were woken around 6:30 by the sound of little feet shuffling down the hallway. In comes our boys completely bright-eyed and bushytailed. They jumped on the bed and were super snuggly and sweet. Next I heard Mango the lab come into our room. I looked at Alec and asked “Is someone in our house?” I thought he had come up with some elaborate plan to have someone get the boys up and out of their rooms and let the dogs out so all my kiddos would wake me up for Mother’s Day. But that wasn’t the case. Tucker said he woke up because there was just a little bit of sun coming into his room. (Note to self: Install a spotlight with a timer outside TJs window to wake him up on time on school days) And apparently he knows how to open the gate in front of Thatcher’s door and broke him out. The gate in the kitchen must not have been latched all the way so lab Mango made a run for it once she saw the boys walk by. My only good kid, wienerdog Berman, stayed in his bed where he was supposed to be. He’s such a good boy! Regardless of how it all happened, it was a perfect start to my day.

The boys gave me the cards they made at school and some pretty little things they picked up at the jewelry store then it was off to church. I love the peace and serenity of sitting next to Alec in church and the pastoral prayer that morning was all about mommas. I was reminded for the millionth time how very blessed I am.  

After church, Alec’s parents and brothers came over for lunch. I’m not sure what made me think of it, but I thought this was the perfect occasion to use my Grandma’s dishes that I still had stashed away in the garage since I got them in November. I carefully washed each plate and let myself be transported back to a different time and place. My heart was full thinking of my grandma and how I’m a momma now.

After my in-laws had left, Alec had gone to the grocery store and the boys had laid down for naps, I gave myself a Mother’s Day gift of lying down on the couch for a minute. Tucker, finally used to not taking naps, came downstairs a few times to ask random silly questions – just trying to get me to let him stay downstairs. Each time I would answer him and tell him to go back upstairs and be quiet for a little bit. Finally, just when I was about to doze off, I heard Tucker come down the stairs but instead of coming all the way to the bottom, he stopped. Then, in the sweetest little voice in the world, I heard “Rock me momma like a wagon wheel; rock me momma anyway you feel; heeeeyyyy, momma rock me.” Hook. Line. Sinker. I got up, got my boy and we snuggled under my new quilt and watched cartoons until Alec came home.

When it was finally time to go to bed, I read Thatcher his new books that I had picked up at the library. After I read the last book, he ran to give Alec and Tucker goodnight kisses then ran back and jumped in bed. I pulled the covers up and tucked him in and gave him a kiss. He took his little finger and started tracing around my face saying “Momma” over and over. Now anyone who knows Thatcher knows he is a total and complete Daddy’s boy. I have succumbed to this and I’m (somewhat) at peace with this. So in this moment, when it was just my baby boy and me, I was captivated. I may have even been hypnotized for a minute. I just remember having this goofy smile on my face and my heart bursting with so much love for this little moment.

At the end of just about every day, I’m exhausted. My schedule is beyond overwhelming. I have moments when I don’t know how I’m going to get through everything, and I miss Alec and my boys more than they can imagine.  But I’m hopeful that the sacrifices I make now will pay off in the long run. I cherish each and every little moment I have with my family because they inspire me and I hope I inspire them.

 

So very blessed.

Happy Birthday, Tucker!

To my four-year-old,

Today is your birthday. I cannot fathom how fast time has flown! I remember every detail of the day you were born - even the commercial that played on the TV over and over and over - during my 19 hours of labor.

What a difference you've made in my life. You made me someone's momma...ok "mom" as you now call me! The world is a different place when you're someone's mom. I have to make it a better place for you. I need to do this. I want to do this.

You deserve nothing but the best in life because that's what you've given me. You challenge me, inspire me, and overwhelm me. You make me proud, crazy, and silly. You've made me the happiest girl in the world, and I'm so lucky to be your mom.

Today you showed me a few things 4-year-olds do: hop on 1 foot, not take naps, and make perfect Ks when writing your name (something that you struggled with right up until today). And this is just the beginning! Think of what amazing things you'll do this next year!

Tucker, you are so amazing and I'm filled with such love and admiration for you. I love how many friends you have and how they all think you are their best friend! I have to say, Buddy, you're one of my best friends too! You are a fantastic big brother and Bubba loves you to pieces! He wants to do everything you do and I can see why. You are an incredible kid!

Thank you for the most fun-filled, exhausting, and crazy four years of my life.

P.S. At bedtime you let me in on one more "what 4-year-olds do" tidbit. You told me 4-year-olds don't go to bed. Hmmm...we'll see about that.

I love you,
Momma

My Bubba is 2!

Happy 2^nd birthday, my sweet Bubba! I have to tell you, I’m just amazed when I look at you and see the little boy you’ve become!  Your smile is absolutely contagious and you say things with such emotion – your personality just shines through!

We had a rough go the first year and about half way through this year, we had to face our biggest challenge as parents so far. You had tubes put in your ears and your adenoids removed. Sweet mercy! I’ve never been so worried in my life! But what a difference it made! I think you are finally the happy boy you were meant to be! Just let that be the last time you make us worry that much!

The best word I can think of to describe you is sweet…an ornery…and a toughie. You have a sweet face and a sly little smile. Sometimes you just hug me and say “Momma” except you say it like “Mmmmommmmaaaa” and it makes my heart leap!

You love to brush your teeth though I suspect you just like to lick the toothpaste off your toothbrush. Just about any time you’re in the bathroom, you want to brush your teeth.  You also like to help unload the dishwasher and put clothes in the washing machine.

On weekend mornings, you like to sit in our laps and have us read books to you – over and over and over. I love that you love books so much! You’re such a smart boy!

And do you ever love your big brother, Tucker! You have become his little shadow! And Tucker loves his little brother too! Watching you guys play and hearing your laughs is the best part of our day!

Bubba, I hope this year is full of new discoveries and lots of laughs and smiles! I hope you love the life we’ve given you because we’re in awe of the love you’ve given us. You made our family perfect and complete.

All my love,

Momma

Ting Ting Ting

My grandma Violet gave me a wind chime a few years ago. I don’t remember the occasion – maybe my birthday or Mother’s Day. The wind chime had a bear on it and wasn’t quite “my style” so I tucked it away somewhere in the garage. I remember the wind chime was moved to different spots in the garage but never on display.

My grandma asked me if I hung up the chime. Yes (lie). Does it go ting ting ting? Yes (lie – how would I know? I never hung it up.).  I hung up the chime when Grandma came to my house for Tucker’s birthday. As soon as she was out the door, the chime came down and back to the garage.

A few months ago, I heard a ting ting ting. Hmmm… So I went outside to find what was making this sound and sure enough, there was the chime hung up on the patio just outside our bedroom window. Alec had cleaned out the garage and came across the chime. He decided it needed to go in its rightful place – on display for all the world to see and hear.

I love that wind chime now. It’s funny how its simple ting ting ting immediately makes me think of my grandma. Sometimes when I’m lying awake at night stressing out and not able to sleep, I’ll hear a little ting ting ting and I know Grandma is there watching over me. A few days ago I realized I hadn’t heard the ting ting ting in a while. I ran outside to make sure the chime hadn’t broken. It was hanging there – just fine. I guess it just wasn’t windy – if you can imagine that in Oklahoma. I gave it a little jiggle to hear the ting ting ting.

Grandma passed away 2 years ago today. I think about her every day and I strive to be her living legacy to Alec and our boys. I hope one day our boys will understand the importance of family and to cherish every gift they receive even if it’s not their style. 

Grandma Violet and a very pregnant Me!

Smiles

I bought a cute journal a few weeks ago that I was going to make my gratitude journal. My plan was to jot down 5 things that I was grateful for each day. I thought this would be a nice way to count my blessings at the end of the day and it would be a nice reference for those days when nothing seems to go right and my head is filled with stress and my heart with worry.

The inside of the journal has yet to see light and there's a nice coating of dust on the outside. So to hold myself a bit more accountable, I thought I'd turn to the information super highway!

I also thought (did you know I'm an over-thinker?) maybe I don't just include things I'm grateful for - what about just simple little things that made me smile each day. After all, aren't the little things that make us smile and warm our hearts the same things we're grateful for? Sure I'm grateful for the big things - my family, my friends, my job, my house, my car....but it's those moments that make me smile that I want to really embrace at the end of each day. Those are the things that add up to the big picture. And I like details. I'm a details  person - I have a hard time seeing the big picture because the details take over - kinda like this blog...and now I'm rambling.

So without further ado - these are the things that made my heart smile today:

Tucker singing "If You're Happy and You Know It" while Thatcher danced and clapped.

Seeing our mama pigeon's little babies all grown up and trying out their flying skills. It seems like just yesterday they were eggs...

Stopping in the middle of our hallway, hugging our boys and saying a prayer for a little girl fighting for her life.

Talking to Alec about insurance and cable - a nice change from the usual conversations about work and kids.

A text from my sister wanting a girls weekend. With me.

These are just a few snippets of my day. Sure I had my fill of pull-my-hair-out crazy moments - like right now the weiner kids are wrestling behind me and I can hardly get my thoughts out- but if I focus on the things that make my heart smile, maybe there will be less stress and worry and more happy.

And Now You're Three!

Dear Tucker-
Your birthday is today - Friday the 13th. When you were born 3 years ago, Grandma Violet said every now and then, your birthday would fall on a Friday - Friday the 13th - and that was okay.

She would've loved the little boy you've become as does every single person who's ever been lucky enough to meet you.

I never knew true love until you came along.  I also never knew how challenging and rewarding it is to be someone's momma. This past year you've certainly tested my patience and my willingness to let you grow up and be more independent.

You make me smile. In the middle of the work day, I'll find myself thinking of you and my face just lights up. All the best times of my day revolve around you - hugging you good morning, kissing you good-bye, hugging hello, story time before bed, kissing goodnight...

You make me want to be a better person. Is that a weird thing to say to a 3-year-old? I'm not sure but I know it's true. I want to be the person you would be proud to call your momma.

You've become such an amazing little boy - so smart and sweet. You've learned so much this past year but I'm most proud of your personality. You've shown so much compassion and love for those around you - your little brother, your dogs, your friends, your family...

I love how many friends you have. All the kids at school know Tucker! I have a feeling you're going to have lots of friends your whole life.

And now as I'm nearing the actual minute you were born (3:48pm) 3 years ago, I can still remember hearing you cry for the first time. I'll never forget that sound. Ever. I thought you sounded like me!

Oh my sweet boy how my heart bursts with love for you. You are one of the best things that has ever happened to me and I thank God he gave you to me. I am so very lucky to have you in my life.

Happy birthday my baby.

Love,
Mommy

And We're Back!

Wow! That was some hiatus! Honestly - I can't seem to find a free second to do much of anything these days.

Because I we like to cram as much as we possibly can into the weekends, Tucker started soccer yesterday. I'm not sure if you call it practice, games, lessons or what but he seemed to like it somewhat. The class he's in (Cottontails) involves the parent too so Alec was the chosen one while I chased a very active Thatcher all around the bleachers.

In Tucker's class, there was one kid who seemed pretty advanced. I'll call him Pele. He was already kicking the ball into the goal and did all of the exercises perfectly. Who is this kid?!? There was also the kid who wouldn't put down his bowl of animal crackers and after about 10 minutes, ended up sitting in the bleachers with his moms for the rest of the time. And there was the one kid whose dad carried him. The. Entire. Time. So Tucker was some where in between Pele, animal cracker kid and overprotective dad kid.

We also planted our garden Saturday. I kept thinking we were getting a late start since Spring began in like January and apparently today Summer started. But actually I think we're a couple of weeks early. The Farmers Almanac says we're past freezing and Ben Franklin's been pretty reliable for quite a while so I was ok planting the garden this weekend.

We planted tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers, jalapenos and beans. Alec thought it would be a good idea to put tomato cages around EVERYTHING since Tucker did step on our one cucumber plant 3 times last year leaving us with no cucumbers for the summer.

That big thing above Thatcher's head is our rosemary from last year. Did you know you can plant rosemary and it will never go away? It's true. It never died and went away. And who am I to put it out of its misery? So...that's our rosemary. And Bubba planning his attack and how to maneuver around the tomato cages.

We also planted some strawberries and I'm working on something fun with my herbs but not sure what yet so they are just sitting on a table anxiously waiting to be part of our little world.

I also finally finished a little crafty project I've been working on. Here's the before:

And the after:

 

I sanded and repainted using milk paint. I've never used it before and felt very Martha-ish...though I'm not sure she's ever used milk paint. Anyway, I wanted something different than a regular ol' TV stand for all our components (DVR, DVD player) so my in-laws had this sweet old dresser and I had Pinterest.

Today our church had a lunch and egg hunt after services. Unbeknownst to us, our boys were also part of the service this morning! We were running late (my bad) and as soon as we dropped them off, they were whisked away with all of the other kids to march through the sanctuary waving palm branches. Needless to say, they were a little freaked out and were carried the entire time. Both of them. And apparently it is not cool to wave at your already freaked out kid as they are being carried by because this makes them cry more. Ugh.

After service, they seemed to be in better moods (whew!) and we had lunch, played games and took a picture with the Easter Bunny (after much coaxing).

I'm not sure why the Easter Bunny thought he was "The Fonz"- maybe he really was cool like that - maybe that's the standard Easter Bunny pose - Who knows?

Tucker also had a good time with his friend Olivia (or Livy as he calls her). Her mom and I made them hug a few times to get some good pictures. Here's one of them:

After the games it was time to hunt eggs. Tucker and Thatcher were in the same age group so that was nice because after Tucker found his allotted 10 eggs, he helped Thatcher find his.

And then we came home and crashed...except Alec who went to the recyclers and the grocery store while I attempted to clean the never ending mess that has become our happy home.

Life is good.